Him

My husband is a tenured Professor with a PhD in World History. He has accomplished a lot in his lifetime but if you ask him he would disagree with that. He also feels as though time is running out. He's past his twenties and therefore he has no more time to accomplish what he wants to accomplish. Mm-hmm. Silly boy.

That being said, a year or two ago he surprised me by telling me he's interested in art. Specifically drawing and ink pens. He can be found with a pen or pencil and a note book at all times now. I. love. it.

He decided he'd like to take a class to help him progress in his new-found hobby. Great idea. We checked out Michaels and he signed up for a class. We purchase the items on the supply list and soon dropped him off. He went in with a smile on his face and came out with...well, not as big of one. There were three students in the class and the other two were two adorable sisters who were probably around eleven and twelve. They were much better than he, he'd proclaimed as he climbed in the car. He'd learned a little but was certain those classes were not for him.

On his own he continued to grow and progress. Sometimes he didn't see the progress, but the beauty of being a bystander is you definitely get to see the progress. I continued to point this out and some days he agreed. Some days he didn't.

One day my phone dinged and it was a text from him:

"Should I buy these online art classes? They are discounted 90% and are $10. I just don't know if I should."

"YES!! DO IT NOW!" I texted back. He did and he has loved those classes! He has gotten so good, too. It's been amazing to watch him.

The above picture was part of a facebook daily challenge with another group. Most of what he draws are things he can see. This picture was just from his mind and it touched my heart. It's different than anything he's ever done and it looks much simpler (although I know nothing about drawing. It was probably difficult!) but in one glance it told a story. A love story. Our love story.

We were so young when we met. I was fifteen and he was barely sixteen. We dated occasionally for a year and became exclusive boyfriend and girlfriend about a year later-my junior year, his senior. I danced. He played the trumpet and was a student body officer. We attended all the school dances together and had such a great time.

He graduated and headed to college on a full-ride trumpet scholarship. I began my senior year. He still lived at home to save money for his mission and we still attended all the dances.  He would surprise me at lunch every so often. Weekends we were inseparable and man the hours we spent on the phone! Makes me wonder how he pulled off those 4.0's his first year of college. Oh yeah. He's an overachiever. And I'm pretty sure he didn't sleep. :)

Soon I graduated and headed off to college. I moved to an apartment near campus thinking I was finally out of the house and ready to be on my own. Soon after, Kim left on his two year mission to Sao Paulo, Brazil. If we had a nickel for every time someone said I wouldn't wait for him we would have had our grad school paid for. The only person who didn't discourage me was my sweet grandmother. She would happily ask each time I saw her how much longer until he was home and how I was doing. She was in the grips of Alzheimer's at the time. She attended our wedding but I'm not sure how aware of our big day she was. I'm sure when she passed and her world became clear again, she celebrated for me. I miss her.

Our first few years of marriage were not easy by any means. We were poor college students struggling to find the balance of us. Outside pressures compounded our struggle and it. was. hard.

The loss of our first-born brought us closer. We were told many times that the death of a child will make or break you. I'm so grateful it was not the latter for us. We moved 1200 miles away from the worst of those outside pressures I mentioned above and that helped so much. We took that journey together and only had each other to rely on. It only cemented us further.

Twenty-two years later we have had our ups and downs but we are strong. Sure we have arguments but honestly not that often. We are respectful of one another. We are mindful of one another and we are kind to one another. Watching some of our friends...that's not always the case.

That picture up there? Yep. It says all that plus a bunch more you don't really want to hear about. Our simple love has grown exponentially and the gratitude I feel for that cannot be expressed adequately. At least not by this girl.

Now, we are watching our oldest son's interest in girls blossom. Our almost twelve year old daughter is so boy crazy she's driving us crazy! But, what is breaking my heart is that they are already settling in a way. They have both let love interests treat them in ways Kim and I never would have treated one another. Neither of them are in anything close to a relationship but the communications they have had are not ideal. Our hope for all our children is they will value themselves enough to value those around them and surround themselves with people who value them.

Our prayer for them (and all of you!) is that they will wait for it. Because when you find it? Well, that unicorns and rainbows thing isn't real, but it's not too far off. It's worth. the. wait.

Editing Blinders

I've always enjoyed editing...sort of. Let me explain. I'm not an eloquent person in person. Finding the right words to convey what's in my heart and mind takes time. A lot of time. And a lot of backspacing. Seriously. But there is something so satisfying about rereading what I've painstakingly worked on and having it read the way I had hoped it would. Truly satisfying. 

I'm by no means a professional editor...sometimes I wonder if I'm even a good editor but I've done my fair share of the task. I did great in my English classes in college and I did get 100% on that facebook grammar test! Yes! Editing my book, however, has been a different experience. I find I get so caught up in the story, I end up with editing blinders on. I focus on the story and skip right over the nuts and bolts. Can you blame me? The story is the fun part. 

I really need to rip those blinders off and burn them, though. For example, in The Heir, in a page and a half, I wrote the word "through" when I was supposed to have written it's twin brother "threw." As I read and kept finding the mix-up, again and again, I was a cross between amused and appalled! I can see getting caught up in what I was writing and doing it once or twice but eight times? (At least!) I fixed those mix-ups and hopefully any like them, but the truth of the matter is, I've probably missed more. It's so hard for me to set the story aside and focus on the mechanics. I try to. I really do but I get sucked in. I have a small army behind me though, who catch what I miss. I sure hope they know how much I appreciate them!

I did learn that when you upload a book to be published in whatever format you're using the characters are changed from letters and numbers to ones and zeros and then back again. (I found that great information here if you want more information on that.) Inevitably all does not go back to the original form it was in. Mistakes will be found no matter how clean the uploaded version is. So, if you find something along your way please comment here or send me a quick email and let me know what you found and where you found it. I may or may not disclose if it was an upload error or a me error! Ha.

In a way, editing blinders can be a positive thing. My sister read The Ordinary in a pretty rough draft form. We live in different states, so when she finished it, she texted me. She gave me a great review (yay!) and then apologized because she kept forgetting she was reading "her sister's book and got lost in the story." Yep. I really like it when editing blinders go on for that reason. 

If you can't spend the money for a professional editor, I have found a few ways to help limit my editing blinders.

1) Read, read, read, and reread. I joked while editing The Heir that I pretty much had it memorized. Reading your writing over and over again helps take you out of the story. Third or fourth time through and you've fixed those places you weren't sure you had conveyed your characters feelings enough or added a little more excitement in that part you felt lulled in chapter sixteen. Getting your story to FEEL right allows you to set that part aside and focus on the nuts and bolts. 

2) Grammarly. Grammarly is amazing. Most of the time I listen to Grammarly. It knows what it's talking about. Whether you're editing a book or a term paper for class, it's wonderful. It's free for the basic level. I have yet to invest in the premium level although I'm really close to doing it. If you've used their premium option I'd love to hear your experiences with it. 

3) Slow down. I have to consciously make myself slow down and really look at each sentence. Sounds obvious but for me it's tricky!

4) Read it aloud. I discovered this quite by accident. My daughter wanted to read The Ordinary and I handed her a scribbled-on manuscript. Before long she came back and said she was having trouble reading through my corrections. This began one of the best ideas I've ever had...reading my book aloud to her! Not only did it give me a perspective I hadn't realized I needed but it was so great to hear her thoughts on the story. She would say, "Wait! No, you need to have them fill in the blank." It was very cool. For The Heir, life was a bit busier and we haven't had a chance to read it together, so I leave early every weekday and head to the car rider line at my daughter's school. It's the perfect place to read aloud without bugging anyone or worrying about spoilers. 

5) Another set of eyes. I've had no trouble finding friends and family who are willing to read it before I publish. I'm grateful for all the help!

These things have helped me so much! But again, if you happen to find errors along the way, please let me know. I won't be offended at all. In fact, I'll appreciate it. However, I truly hope you get lost in the story and don't realize you happen to have on editing blinders as well. :) 

Happy reading! Whatever that may be.

Project Life

Years ago my sweet cousin introduced me to scrapbooking. She'd been doing it for years but I hadn't taken the plunge yet. My husband and I were both students at the time, and money was TIGHT! I worried about adding the expense to our already tiny budget. (Although, my husband encouraged it!)

Not long after our son passed, (you can read a little about that HERE) my cousin called and invited me to her weekly scrapbooking night. I took the prints I had of my little guy and headed to her house. I don't know that I've ever told her how much I appreciated those evenings we spent at her home. Those weeks that followed his death were so very, very dark. Grief is temperamental and some days it swallowed me whole.  Sitting in a room with her, my sister and cousins documenting his short life and the enormous impact he had on us was so therapeutic.  Our little group kept my head above water and I so appreciate them. They created a safe place for me to walk back into those experiences that were so tender, so miraculous and so devastating at the same time. She also generously shared her scrapbooking stash. I often wonder if I took advantage...I hope not but sure apologize if I did.

From that, my love of scrapbooking was born. I really did enjoy creating pages and watching our lives fill the pages of a binder on the shelf. After we adopted Kaleb, my time became more and more limited and my scrapbooking days dwindled. Years later they were pretty much nonexistent. I didn't have an hour to spend on each page, especially as we added more children to our family. Years were ticking by, and our photos were piling up. Documenting our lives was important to me and I couldn't seem to find a way to keep up with it all. I realized as time went on and my photos sat untouched longer and longer, I was FORGETTING. It was getting to the point where I could flip through our photo's and not remember exactly where we were or what we were doing. More importantly, I knew I was losing the feelings behind why I took the photo in the first place. That just added to my guilt. 

In 2011, I discovered Project Life by Becky Higgins. I had "known" Becky (I didn't really know her although I would totally be her friend!) for a long time through the Creative Keepsakes magazine and her published books, so when I saw her new product (I'm not sure how long it had been out before I snatched it up) it was a no-brainer. It has changed. my. life. Not only have I been able to keep up on documenting our lives but I've been able to go back and catch up on years I've missed. The guilt is gone! 

The first kit I purchased from Project life was a core kit and it came with beautiful, coordinated filler and journaling cards. The sheet protectors I chose had four 4x6 slots and four 2x3 slots on each page. (She has lots to choose from) I simply slipped my photos into the slots, journaled my memories about each photo on the 4x6 or 2x3 stylish journaling cards and added them in the appropriate spots. And done!

Since then Project Life has introduced a digital version so you can complete the pages with never printing a photo or physically writing on a piece of paper. I never did try digital but I signed up at lightning speed for the Project Life App when she released that. I've never gone back to paper although I still have a couple boxes of photos I need to do so eventually I will once again. Now I scrapbook from my iPad or phone when I'm watching TV, sitting in the car rider line or waiting for an appointment. Anytime I have a few minutes to kill I can pull out my phone and complete a page in no time at all. I no longer have to worry about losing photos. I create a project life page, print them and tuck them in my album.

Project Life has a way to print the pages from their app or order albums but I choose to print them at home. Our printer does a good job and it's the most economical way for me to do it right now. My pages are saved on my computer, so if I decide down the road to print them another way I certainly have that option.

I'm sharing all this with you today for one reason, though. (No this isn't a sponsored post. Becky Higgins has no idea who I am and will most likely never even see this post!) I've mentioned I never really expected to share my novel with anyone other than my immediate family. The roller coaster of emotions I went through as I pushed myself to put myself out there was intense. I didn't sleep for a few weeks after I clicked the "publish" button. No joke. Project life gave me an almost immediate way to document my feelings. It was all done within a day or two! 

See!

These pages were created on the app on my phone. For each month I choose a different color background so I don't have to add the date to every page. This month was white. You can see different choices below. 

Look at my baby! She's eight now. Time. slow. down. Below are the physical 12x12 albums. I slipped each photo and the cards in and done.

Kyleigh is so tiny, too! That bottom right photo? Sometimes when I would speak firmly to her she'd solute me and say, "yes, Ma'am!" Like, okay I see you are serious about this. Got it! :)

 This kid is driving now! 

Below is one of my 8x8 albums. These pages were done with the Project Live app and printed at home on my personal printer. We have the HP Instant Ink program which allows me to print 300 copies a month with as much color as I want! It really makes printing these so economical and the quality is great.

This size (8x8) is so great for little hands. (These 8x8 albums are not Project life. My local craft stores don't carry that size and so I used these instead. They fit great.)

Excuse the poor lighting but this is the best reason to document! She giggled and giggled looking through our albums last night. I don't know why she brought the kitchen chair over, though. I guess to be closer to the pictures. Silly girl.

Breakfast Pizza

Poor time. No one seems to accept it for who it is. We are constantly asking it to hurry up...my daughter is almost twelve and cannot wait for that birthday. Twelve is a big number in our house. You get to start wearing makeup at twelve. Hurry up time.

On the other hand, my babies are growing so fast. Those newborn, sleepless nights are long gone and I have said at least a million times, please, time--slow down. It's all going too fast.

Traditions, for me anyway, seem to ease the pain of time. Traditions somewhat let us pause a cherished moment. Traditions are the ultimate walk down memory lane all while creating a few new memories along the way while bringing those you love the most right along with you. Traditions are time beating (really celebrating) superheroes. Yep. Sign. me. up.

Traditions come in all shapes and sizes. Some are big, loud, in-your-face-extravagant and others are so subtle you might not even realize they are a tradition until a little person in your house points it out. "We can't go to bed without reading! It's a TRADITION!" Silly me. I thought that was a routine. But, somewhere along the way it became just that for that little person in our home. Ok. Tradition it is.

Breakfast pizza is a subtle tradition in our home. I'm not sure where exactly it originated but my mom used to make it for us when I was a kid. It always takes me back to her kitchen when I make it. We loved that stuff and now my kids do, too. You may be wondering where exactly the tradition is in breakfast pizza. The tradition comes in the fact that we never actually eat it for breakfast. We may have growing up but here in the Richardson household, I don't believe I've ever made it for breakfast. 

One aspect of writing The Ordinary Series that has been so fun for me is including some of our favorite traditions. Breakfast pizza is one of those that made its way into the series. I thought it might be fun to share the recipe here. It's super simple. PRINT RECIPE

Breakfast Pizza

1 egg                           1 cup regular pancake mix

¾ cup milk                  1 cup rice cereal

¼ cup oil                     cinnamon and sugar mix

Combine egg, milk, oil and pancake mix in a bowl; mix well until well blended. Pour into greased 12-inch pizza pan. Sprinkle with cinnamon/sugar mix and cereal. Bake in preheated oven, 425 degrees for 10-12 minutes or until top springs back when lightly pressed.

*Note: I double the ingredients and use a cookie sheet to feed my crew. Hope you enjoy!

www.theordinaryseries.blogspot.com

Utah Favorites

If I haven't mentioned it already, I grew up in a little suburb of Salt Lake City, UT. I never had a desire to leave...more than that. I never thought I'd leave Utah. Sure, maybe venture to Odgen or end up in some cute tiny town in southern Utah, but the thought never crossed my mind that I would leave. Never.

Remember that boy I told you about here? Well, he came to me one day and said he'd like to apply to grad school. Sure. Of course, I'll support you. He told me it would need to be out of state so we could someday return. I agreed because that boy of mine doesn't like change. No way would he follow through!

But, he did. He was accepted to the University of Texas and off we went. I should scrounge through my old photo's because I have several pictures of the back of a moving truck in the middle of nowhere. I cried that day as I followed him out of Utah. It felt like I'd never get back and that was heartbreaking for me. It's almost been eighteen years since that day. We still haven't made it back. It's not where we are supposed to be and I try really hard to accept that. Somedays are easier than others.

Since then we've lived in Lubbock, TX, Richmond, VA, and settled in South Carolina. I love all the places we've lived and the places we've visited around them. As much as I miss our families, I'm grateful for the opportunities we've been given and the chance to explore this country. We have had some really great adventures and learned so much. A piece of my heart will always be in Utah, though. We try to get back once a year and when we do, we pack it full of things to do.

This is a great list of fantastic places to visit if you're ever there. I've done most of them and would highly recommend them all! I thought I'd fill this post with our families favorites--what they are and why they mean something to us.

1) Temple Square

Temple Square is on the top ten link above, but it's definitely one of our favorite places to visit, so I added it here, too. There is so much to do around it as well. The Beehive house, the Church History Museum, the Joseph Smith Memorial building. So. much. 

This is a family favorite because it's where I married that cute boy of mine. Kaleb was sealed to us there as well. You can learn more about temples here.

2) This Is The Place Monument. We love this place because of the history but also because of all the things to do. You really could spend more than one day here.

There are two parts to this. The above picture you can visit for free. Wander around. Enjoy the views. Then for a fee, there is another part. It's well worth the money, though. There is so much to see and do. We bring a picnic and rest partway through our visit. There is a handy-dandy shuttle that comes every few minutes to take you around, but even with that, there is a lot of walking. Rested little legs and fed little tummies make all the difference!

Pet the farm animals

Float boats down the stream

And then there's THIS! Even my teenager (it's tricky to get a picture of him these days!) went in that thing.

Pan for gold

Pony rides

There are several historic homes to tour including a school and a blacksmith's shop and MORE. So. much. fun. 

We wore them out!

3) Fort Buenaventura in Ogden is another fun place we like to visit. We've had informal family reunions here and done family photos. It's a beautiful place. This is their website. 

This portion of the park wasn't open the day we were here, but my husband and daughter got creative in their documenting to prove we were here!

4) Splash Parks! There are a ton of these in Utah. I know they are all over the country but none in our little town in SC. They are a must-do for sure!

I even got a little writing done on this day! 

6) Memory Lane! My mother grew up in Beaver, Utah and that place is so near and dear to my heart! We don't get down there every year but when we do, the riverbed road in Greenville is always on the list. So is the Cache Valley Creamery. I don't have a picture of that (well, not posted here at least), but it has the best ice cream and CHEESE! We lovingly refer to it at Beaver cheese and it's a sacred item in our house. Especially now that it's rare to have it in our home!

Greenville Riverbed Road

The old church (I believe...correct me if I'm wrong mom)

The Old Schoolhouse. I believe my grandfather rode a horse in one door and out the other when he was a boy. I definitely need to ask about that story again. I'll update here when I do!

My mother spent the first five years of her life in this cute house. While my grandmother was in the hospital giving birth to my mom, my grandfather moved her out of the house they were in and into this home with his mother...without telling my grandmother! Can you believe he lived to tell about that? :) I believe they lived here for about five years before Grandpa bought the home next to the Creamery where they both lived out there days.

To conclude this "memory lane" tour, this was our first apartment! It's in Bountiful, Utah and our unit was the top left. It's a cute little one bedroom apartment. We only stayed six months, though. At the time (I hope they figured out how to fix it) it was SO hot. We moved in in November. Hot should not have been an issue. On the plus side, we never turned the heat on that winter. We did, however, open the windows. Weird. That sounds more like SC weather than UT weather! It's hard to believe that was 22 years ago!

7) Cove Fort is a place we don't get to often but when we head to southern Utah, we definitely try to stop. It was built in 1867 as a safe spot for travelers. There is a lot of interesting history there. You can find a lot more information here. It's such an interesting place to go. (They have better pictures on their website than I do here, too!)

I loved these missionary scarecrows. So clever and so fitting since couple missionaries for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints run the place.

8) The Heber Creeper! Ok, it's not called that anymore. It's the Utah Valley Railroad, but it will always be lovingly referred to as the "Creeper Creeper," in our home. I think it was my youngest sister who called it that when she was teeny tiny. It stuck. It's located in another super cute town, Heber City, and if you get a chance to go, you should.

They did the cutest train robbery. My girls missed most of what they said because they were worried about the noise from the guns!

The actual train ride is so beautiful. They have different themes going on at different times. This time they had some musicians play and a few trivia games etc. 

There is a food car on the train where you can purchase snacks. Although, at the time they didn't mind us bringing our own. I don't know if they have changed their policy since then so I would ask or check their website to be sure.

Heber Valley Railroad also does a Christmas train ride with a very special jolly guest. We've done that one before as well and my kids still talk about it. Special memory making for sure.

There are more things we love to do but I think I'll leave you with that for now. What are your favorites?